A new due South ficlet

[history_gurl]

I wrote this in response to a prompt from sdraevn here.

She made my RayK muse sit up and take notice and pester the crap outta my brain until this was written. Damn her and her fannish ways!

Title: Falling
Pairing: Fraser/RayK preslash
Rating: G
Summary: (stolen directly from the prompt) Sometimes you want to fall.



Sometimes you *want* to fall.

Ray doesn't know when he learned this, but he did. He sure as hell knows he did not know this when he was thirteen years old, pissing himself in a bank.

Back then, Ray knew that they were screwed. He knew that Stella, the pretty blonde girl, was scared. Hell, he knew the grown-ups were scared. Ray was scared too, scared to die, scared to do nothing, but more scared to do something. He looked over the edge, and he was so scared, and he fell.

Suddenly, Ray was Stella's hero. He saved her, he saved everybody, and Stella loved Ray for it. And the edge got sharper, higher, scarier. And Ray, well, he had to walk closer to that edge. And falling? Well, falling got to be something that Ray avoided every day. He tried to stick with loving Stella and hoping for the best.

One day, Ray realized that instead of just loving Stella, he could be in love with her. That day, Ray thought about wanting to fall. Looking back, Ray thinks maybe he thought he knew about wanting to fall then. But he didn't, not really, not then. So, instead of falling, he jumped. Ray leaped in with both feet, and he never looked back, except when he did.

Ray never fell with Stella, not so it mattered. He only knew this after. The loving was easy, it wasn't falling, it just was. The falling came later. And it was just as scary as the bank, and the hero, and the being loved. The falling with Stella was the falling apart, and Ray didn't want to fall.

Ray Vecchio knew about falling. There was falling out of cars, and falling off buildings, and falling through windows. And, yeah, sometimes, he wanted to do those things for Fraser, but Ray knew he didn't really want to fall. To be Ray Vecchio, he had to fall.

Then, Ray Vecchio came back. And Fraser and Ray Kowalski fell off a plane. And they fell down a mountain. And they fell into a crevasse. And Fraser fell down a mineshaft with Muldoon. And, sitting around a campfire, Ray fell into Fraser. And Ray Kowalski didn't have to fall.

When Ray settled himself into the sled with the tallow and the tack and an old map, he knew. When he watched Fraser salute Buck Frobisher, he knew. When they slid across the snow field, falling into adventure, he knew.

Sometimes you *want* to fall.

Comments

[j-s-cavalcante.livejournal.com]

Ooh, I love this. Sweet and gloriously subtle. I dunno why, but it has never occurred to me that Ray saved everyone in that bank (not just Stella) from the bank robber. Duh. *Smacks self* That is so consistent with the cop he later becomes, saving people because he is who he is, even though he's scared and would prefer to protect himself. So pissing himself in the bank, though mortifying at the time, was a good thing--a fact he recognizes when he actually thanks Marcus Ellery during the eclipse.

I love the falling idea, literally and metaphorically (i.e., falling in love, falling into adventure). Falling is such a huge theme in dS. And this is so telling:

And, sitting around a campfire, Ray fell into Fraser. And Ray Kowalski didn't have to fall.

So astute. Hey, maybe the story isn't so much pre-slash as G-rated slash. :) Because the idea's there, it's just subtly expressed.

J S

[history-gurl.livejournal.com]

I'm so glad you liked it. *g*

Sweet and gloriously subtle

Funny, that's how I often think of RayK. Which, of course, seems to fly in the face of canon. Buuuuuut, I think Ray is much subtler than it would first appear.

The minute I read this prompt on my flist, I thought of Ray. I thought of how he seemed so open, so there in all of his interactions. But, at the same time, there was so much other stuff under there, stuff that we never really got more than hints at. And that may be the most convoluted non-explanation I've ever written. But, hey, it's all I got. Maybe I'll get coherent about it someday and go all meta.

Hey, maybe the story isn't so much pre-slash as G-rated slash. :) Because the idea's there, it's just subtly expressed

Cute. But, nah, I usually at least put a kiss in my G-rated slash. *eg* Ray and I discussed it though, and he agrees that the next story should be all porn, all the time. Wish me luck!

[missapocalyptic.livejournal.com]

Ray and I discussed it though, and he agrees that the next story should be all porn, all the time. Wish me luck!

From the bottom of my heart: Good luck!!!

And my best wishes to Ray *g*

[history-gurl.livejournal.com]

Here's to porn!

Okay, should this be the point at which I admit to hearing character voices in my head? Or have I already done that, if somewhat obliquely? Or should I be reassuring people that I'm not crazy? Oh, wait, this is a fandom where ghosts are canon. Ignore all that then.

Oh, and Ray says "Thank you kindly." Guess Fraser's rubbing off on him. *pun oh so very intended*

[j-s-cavalcante.livejournal.com]

The minute I read this prompt on my flist, I thought of Ray. I thought of how he seemed so open, so there in all of his interactions. But, at the same time, there was so much other stuff under there, stuff that we never really got more than hints at. And that may be the most convoluted non-explanation I've ever written.

Actually, I get it. Callum's characters are all like that.

But, hey, it's all I got. Maybe I'll get coherent about it someday and go all meta.

Oh, please! Do it in fiction!

I usually at least put a kiss in my G-rated slash.

I thought the phrase "falling into Fraser" was quite evocative of slash, actually. :)

Ray and I discussed it though, and he agrees that the next story should be all porn, all the time. Wish me luck!

Will I ever! GOOD LUCK!!!!!!!!

J S

P.S. I'm sure this is a dumb question, but you know the saying, the dumbest question is the one you don't ask. What's a "prompt on your flist"?

[j-s-cavalcante.livejournal.com]

Oops! "Ray fell into Fraser." That was the exact phrase. I don't think a kiss was really needed to convey the idea. :)

J S

[history-gurl.livejournal.com]

Again with the total agreement. Honestly, I think Ray and Fraser just being in the same room is slashy though. But yeah, Ray is totally planning to do Fraser early and often. *eg*

[j-s-cavalcante.livejournal.com]

Yep, total agreement here, too. They are SO doing each other. :)

J S

[history-gurl.livejournal.com]

Callum's characters are all like that

And now it's my turn to say, I get it. He is a fanfiction writer's dream. I just rewatched "Burning Down the House" with my kids tonight (what? everybody needs fandom, even preteens), and I was struck by how much is and isn't said in his little monologue while Fraser searches the car ... from the outside. Even more telling than that, though, are his facial expressions throughout the episode. From his wink when he answers the phone, to his "posturing" with Motherwell, to his shy grin when Fraser asks him out to dinner, Callum tells us so much about Ray it's like he was there all along.

Or, maybe I'm a hopeless fangirl. Could go either way. :) But I can say I'm positive I'll explore it all in fiction one day. Probably sooner, rather than later. *g*

What's a "prompt on your flist"?

First, there are no dumb questions. That what I tell my students anyway. Of course, sometimes I'm lying to them ... but not to you.

I'll answer this backwards. A "flist" is the bastardized abbreviation of friends list. Teh internets makes me lazy. My flist is the list of posts I get when I click on Friends.

The prompt part of it is all sdraevn's fault. In her post (which you can read by clicking on "here" in the first sentence of my post) she talked about how a story starts. She explained how she ended up with that line, "sometimes you *want* to fall," eating her brain. And then she outlined how it might end up an Atlantis fic. And then she said, gee, wonder what you guys would do with this, write me something, any fandom.

So, I said "baaaaa" like the sheep I am, and rushed off to write. The rest, as they say, is history. Or, at least, a really long explanatory comment.

There you go, question answered. Oh, and the short version of the answer is, I stole somebody's story idea, but she's okay with it. *eg*

[j-s-cavalcante.livejournal.com]

First (proceeding in reverse order), thanks for the explanation. Hey, you didn't steal the idea...she gave it to you and asked you to use it. :)

Second, you're right about Callum (as Ray, or in almost any role), a fanfic writer's dream for sure. And BTW I watch dS with my kids (ages 10 and 7), too. They love it.

Callum is such a gifted actor. I don't mean to suggest he doesn't work hard, because he obviously does, but it's clear he's got talent to burn. And he's such a chameleon. He looks totally different in each role. Even as Ray, he looks different from episode to episode.

I could give dozens of examples of his brilliance, but here's one that wowed me: he plays a "tyrant dad" in "Falling Angels." I HATE tyrant Dads. It's hard to sell me on the good points of that type of character. But I didn't hate Callum's. He wasn't some stock Tyrant Dad, he was a real person, who had a painful history, a reason why he was that way. Almost from the first scene, I *felt* for the guy. I understood at least some of his pain, even before it was explained. And this was a typically Canadian movie, subtler than an American film would be. It didn't hit you over the head with most of its message. But Callum...he communicates in that medium as clearly as a bell. He does this truly great work without a ton of dialogue, too.

I also saw "Masterminds" recently. Kind of a silly film, but Patrick Stewart was one of the stars. Stewart was unexceptional. Callum had a very small role. But he absolutely stole and walked away with his scenes. He made what was otherwise a very 2-dimensional, utility-bad-guy role into a 3-dimensional character that you had to love, rooted for, and could write fanfic about. He did it with a credible working-class British accent, too.

I'd better stop now. Guess I'm over the hopeless-fangirl line, too, huh? (My inner child whines: "But, Ma! Not my fault! Callum started it!" :)

J S

[history-gurl.livejournal.com]

And, wow, over a week to respond ... I am sloooooooooow. But, two points I need to make, cuz, um, well, I want to. :)

First, I do believe we should all be hopeless fangirls for Callum. Yum! And, I especially love him in quiet, little Canadian movies where the lines are never so clearly drawn, and the endings are never 100% happy. I think he shines in those types of roles. And I agree that his brilliance makes it look easy. The only other actor I've seen do this consistently is David Hewlett. If you like Canadian movies, see "Treed Murray" or "Get Down" as it went by in the States. Hewlett does amazing things with an unsympathetic character, not unlike Callum. Mmmm, Canadian boys rock.

Second, my kids are totally hooked! I was out of town, working, and when I returned they informed me that they'd been watching the DVDs without me. Traitors! :) They also told me that seasons one and two are on at 7 am on Showcase every morning. My daughters, aged 10 and 12, are getting up early so they can watch due South. Mwahahahahahah! My evil plan is working.

[grey853.livejournal.com]

Short, but sweet. Thanks for sharing.

[history-gurl.livejournal.com]

Thanks for reading. Glad you liked it.

[01100100.livejournal.com]

I thought this was lovely. I really enjoyed it. I think you did better with the line than I did (and failed) ;-)

[history-gurl.livejournal.com]

I'm glad you liked it. It is a great line.

Aaaaaaaaand, I read what you did with the line. So not failure. Just wish I'd remembered to post a comment to it when I was catching up with the flist after being out of town. Skipped back 120, jeez.